Two Regrets of a Divorced Woman

By | Child Support, Community Property, Custody and Conservatorship, Divorce, Marital Property Division, Separate Property

This article was originally published by Plaid for Women https://www.plaidforwomen.com/read-post/two-regrets-of-a-divorced-woman/

The Family Courthouse is paved with women who claim the system is against them. Many feel that they waited too long and some wish they had tried harder to reconcile. Beyond the emotional wasteland left by a divorce, a divorced woman has many economical regrets. Here are two I have heard over and over again:

1. That they didn’t stay employed.

Some women report being frustrated that they were not entitled to spousal maintenance or did not get as much as they would have liked. This is especially true for the homemaker, but in our changing society where women are increasingly doing the “bread winning,” it can be true for husbands as well. Texas law allows for monthly spousal maintenance (a/k/a support) up to $5,000 or 20% of an ex-spouse’s gross income, whichever is lower, if a spouse can prove that she “lacks sufficient property including the spouse’s separate property, on dissolution of the marriage to provide for the spouse’s minimum reasonable needs” among other elements. Please refer to Texas Family Code Chapter 8 for the entire law which contains other elements and factors not addressed here.

Flushing out what “lacking sufficient property” actually means is difficult. Case law demonstrates that Courts look to a variety of factors including, the community property award in the divorce and the spouses education, separate property, health, employment experience and business opportunities. There is no formula such as monthly expenses are $3,000 therefor the spouse is awarded $3,000. It’s much broader than that.

The practical application of this law makes spousal maintenance quite difficult to obtain. One, the ex-spouse may not have sufficient income to pay what is needed for the spouse to get by and two, minimum reasonable needs are typically shelter and food, not mani/pedis. Much to the disappointment of many women, the standard is not to keep the divorced spouse’s lifestyle the same as her married lifestyle.

A common example would be a spouse married to a hard working executive who chooses to stay home because it’s hard enough on the family that one parent is gone all the time. The hard working executive works too hard and picks up a nasty addiction to alcohol. The alcohol abuse leads to the couple’s cash reserves being used up for rehab, disability, therapy and suddenly, when the alcoholism finally destroys the relationship, the money is gone. Now, homemaking spouse is unemployed with a ton of bills and the hard working spouse is no longer employed at the rate he was. Her best asset is now her resilience, from which she has to dig deep to find and use to fuel moving on.

On the flip side but on the same side of the coin, had the homemaking spouse stayed employed, she would at least have somewhere to start. Any place other than unemployed and broke is better than that. True, a spouse with some employment opportunity would be less eligible for spousal maintenance but at least she would have a paycheck rather than being subject to the court’s wide-ranging discretion. It can take months before spousal maintenance is ordered by the court and actually paid by the spouse. A judge can only enter orders and enforce them. She cannot babysit the parties to make sure it gets done. And can you hear the “cha-ching”? Every time a lawyer has to go back to court for something, it costs.

2. That they kept documents.

The way assets and debts are awarded in divorce requires some level of proof as to the asset or debt’s status. How do you prove you used your inheritance to buy the house if you don’t have any records? How do you show that you funded your 401(k) for years prior to marriage? How much cash does a spouse earn under the table? How many credit cards and lines of credit are out there? The dining furniture was a gift to both of you right?

Keeping original documents regarding important transactions are important for many reasons, too many of which to cover in this article. I will discuss two. One, having documents is important to show when property or debt is separate since the law presumes all property and debt owned by either party belongs to the community. In order to overcome that presumption, a party must submit proof that a particular asset or debt is separate property. Separate property is acquired before marriage, by gift or by inheritance. Proof is usually in the form of bank accounts, check stubs, contracts, paychecks, letters, titles and so forth. Who keeps up with that stuff? Not everyone, but the divorced spouse wishes she had.

Secondly, keeping original documents is important to show the current status of income, debt and other property rights. For example, wife swears husband got a $50,000 bonus and bought a sports car for his girlfriend in her name with the cash. This stuff happens people. I know you know it does. Continuing on, the company that bonused him is now out of business and the $300 an hour lawyer can’t subpoena documents to prove the bonus ever existed. This leads to another topic for another day. Stay involved in the finances. This scenario can be a huge waste of time and money for everyone to prove either the existence of a lie or to disprove a wild allegation impossible to disprove because it never happened.

Reasons to Get Along With Ex-Spouse

By | Co-Parenting, Custody and Conservatorship, Divorce

1. MONEY! If you have become intimately familiar with the billable hour and retainers then you know what I am talking about. Reading billing statements showing entries for lawyer time for discussing who gets “this” or “that” is painful. Clients find themselves asking “I have to pay a thousand dollar bill from my attorney because my ex-spouse’s attorney called her five times to negotiate the china cabinet?” How does that make sense? If spouses are able discuss what assets and debts go with whom, then they will save money. It goes without saying that the attorney’s fees factor can grow exponentially when there are parenting issues.

2. It’s better for the kids. I’m just a family law attorney, but how can children learn to resolve conflict if their parents can’t agree on a pick up time or child support? They may learn how to build walls, ahem, I mean boundaries, but they will not learn how to resolve conflict. I find that those children then exhibit the same behaivor against their parents as their parents exhibited towards the other during the divorce. Talk about backfiring.

3. It will prevent future litigation. When kids are involved, it’s not always over when the divorce is granted. Many issues can arise in the future as the needs of the family change. It is very common for financial and emotional needs to change. For example, a teenager may need more time with the other parent during a certain time of his or her life and if his or her parents don’t get along, all out war will erupt when the child asks to be interviewed by the court.

4. Defamation is tough to prove. If an ex-spouse is prone to blast the other in the community, it’s difficult to tame the loud mouth and courts are not always willing to use their power to get involved.

5. The finale – You will see your child more. Getting along with your ex-spouse means you can squeeze an extra day into your ski vacation or switch a weekend here or there. It could also mean you get more communication about the child’s schoolwork, extra curriculars, a bad breakup and so on.

The Subpoena Power

By | Child Support, Community Property, Custody and Conservatorship, Divorce, Just and Right, Marital Property Division, Separate Property, Trial Issues

There are two types of subpoenas that can command two types of actions. Trial subpoenas command appearance at a trial or hearing and discovery subpoenas command appearance to give testimony for the purpose of discovery of evidence. Either way, the subpoena can also ask for production of documents or tangible items for trial, a hearing or discovery.

The subpoena power can reach beyond the parties in a lawsuit. It can also compel non-parties or entities to comply. Although there are some limits, generally speaking, someone can be compelled to testify or produce documents in a case that they are not directly involved in. For example, Denise Richards could have been subpoenaed in Charlie Sheen’s criminal assault case for his alleged attack on Brooke Mueller. In his suit against Kim Kardashian, Chris Humphries (her 72 day husband) subpoenaed Kanye West (her boyfriend) to appear and give testimony at a deposition, purportedly to show she didn’t intend to marry Chris for legitimate reasons.

Oftentimes, the only way to obtain admissible evidence in a case and prepare for trial is to seek information from third parties using a subpoena. Bank records, computer files, corporate books and records, report cards, medical records, phone records and so forth are good examples. Note: Facebook and other social media sites are protected by federal law from the subpoena power.

Failing to comply with a subpoena could result in contempt charges. The statute allows for a court to assess fines or require the non-appearing party to be confined. Texas Rule of Civil Procedure 176.8.

Court Refuses to Admit Facebook Pictures

By | Custody and Conservatorship, Divorce, Trial Issues

A Webb County District Court refused to admit a mother’s provocative Facebook pictures in a termination case. The County Attorney attempted to introduce Facebook pictures and posts by asking the mother if she in fact had posted provocative pictures of herself. When the mother said no, the attorney sought to use the pictures to show the jury that the mother was a liar and to impeach her character. I’m sure the shock factor of a mother of six posing for nasty pictures for the public to see was only a small bonus.

The mother, whose Facebook pictures and comments were too inappropriate for repeating here, argued that they should be excluded for two reasons. One, because she recanted her testimony that she hadn’t posted provocative pictures, and two, because they were more prejudicial that probative.

The Appellate Court agreed with her first point because the record showed the jury already knew she was liar and the introduction of more evidence that she lied about whether or not she posts provocative pictures of Facebook would be redundant. The Court then cited the proposition that exclusion of evidence that is cumulative is harmless.

I’m not saying there is much of a lesson in this case except that there are situations where Facebook pictures are inadmissible. The mother in this case was accused of many disturbing acts including trying to set her house on fire with her children in it. I don’t think the Facebook pictures were the center of the County’s case.